The watcher inside me The one beyond sight See and see and see No malice yet might
It keeps sentry Day or night No end, no entry No dark, no light
One day I’ll be one with it One day I’ll see all that it sees One day I’ll watch all that rises does fall One day I’ll feel all alive does die One day I’ll sense all dead beings rising One day I’ll whisper the key to living One day I’ll teach the one language to all!
I made a solemn promise to myself yesterday that I would get back to blogging from today onwards. So, here goes nothing…
Umm… I am supposed to write a whole page about something but I don’t know what. Should I write about the enforced sabbatical I had to take from the professional world due to some psychiatric problems or should I focus on the path I have been walking on since these problems cropped up? Can’t make up my mind, drawing a blank every time. Lemme see. I will start with the problems that I have been facing for almost twenty months now…
Once upon a time in a galaxy far too near, on planet Earth lived this organic form, called a human being in the native language, who was suffering from depression. Let us see what steps it took to cure itself.
It consulted a psychiatrist who promptly hospitalised it and prescribed meds to begin the process of transforming it from a human being to zombie.
Finally, after a substantial amount of time had passed, it started rebelling coz it didn’t want to be a zombie anymore. As a first step towards that goal, it switched the mental health providers, i.e. doctors. The new doctor changed all the medicines and prescribed a psychological test too (conveniently the test was in MCQ format) to find the main culprit for the depression. The test revealed the root cause – BPD or Borderline Personality Disorder.
The human being tried to understand the nature of the culprit but wasn’t really able to grasp the concept in its entirety. Thus, began the long process of struggle with it. Several epic wars were fought over the course of twenty months to defeat the culprit. Finally, the day arrived when the enemy was defeated. The human being won. How? Coz the enemy’s nature was laid bare. The moment the enemy’s nature was revealed, the path to defeating it lay wide open.
Of course, the path is long, tedious and full of hurdles but I have already taken so many steps down the road. There is no turning back. Every person in this world struggles to achieve one thing or another. My struggle is for just my peace, my well-being and of those around me. I keep taking one step at a time. Step by step the journey will be completed. In the meanwhile, I just have to make that extra effort…find the strength to stand up after each time I fall down. Hurdles only mean more power, more strength which is all good news for me.