Isolation…

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Isolation in my mind
Dark shadows everywhere.
Cut apart, left adrift in the currents
Float do I in the flotsam of life.

Despair do I
Want to cry
Sometimes I cannot understand myself
A thousand emotions on a thousand shelves.

Overcrowded are they.
Pull out an emotion you may
Try but in the end of the day
A discordant symphony you play.

Discordant symphony or a cacophony
All they are, are fake, are phony
An empty mind, a desolation
Even the Doc says how bogus are my notions.

Lie heavily on my heart, does the isolation
Broken memories, false emotions
Weep, weep does my heart at the blackness
Surrounded as it is by shades of grey.

Is it all a farce played upon my mind
Or the truth of a fractured one?
I walk the thorny path of truth
Without a correct measure to enlighten.

I welcomed the numbness
In the beginning brought on by the meds
Alas, they are done for now
Isolation darkens the horizon now.

Tears…

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So many tears,
Still inside me
Come out, come out,
Don’t play hide and seek.
Beneficial to none
You or me.
 
Come down as if,
Torrents of rain.
Or the colourful condensations
On my windowpane.
 
Come down as the gushing spring,
Running against the passage of time.
Beautiful teardrops of glass or diamonds,
In my eyes – sparkle and chime.
 
Gather against the little eyefolds,
Overwhelm them with sheer magnitude.
Then roll down peacefully down the cheeks,
On my breast they stumble and sleep.

What’s in a word?

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Aloneness…

Beauty.. Peace… Love… Happiness…

A time to think, rethink…meditate, contemplate….

A time to review, rehash, revise, revive…

To make amends…

Independence… Bliss…

 

Loneliness…

Misery… Pain… Anguish… Darkness…

A time to think, rethink, burn, blame…

A time to review, rehash, despair, cry…

An ode to torment…

Dependence… Despondency…

 

 

 

What I learnt today…

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Others cannot hurt you. The actions of others do not give rise to emotions in you. You feel, you react because those emotions are already there inside you. You react to your own emotions. You perceive the words and actions of others the way you have habituated yourself to do. Good habits and bad – both are learned, both trainable. Your perception is what that matters. If your perception is positive, your emotions are positive, then you keep calm even in the most dire and worst of situations. If your perception is negative, then you end up making yourself miserable even in the best situation.

Don’t blame others for your misery. The root of it lies within yourself, in your own mind, in the training you have given your mind. Improve your thoughts, improve your mind, educate it, don’t be blind. Improve your self, improve your life. The path to eternal happiness lies within your own mind. Find it. Walk on it diligently, sincerely. In no time, you will reach your goal. Become the calm, serene, deep lake that you can be. No ripples, no waves. Just peace. Just sanity. Just happiness. Don’t beg for happiness, don’t cry for it or feel as if you are entitled to it. No one is! Work for it, work hard! Train your mind, make it pure. That’s the only way.

So simple and yet so difficult….:)

Be happy!

Buck Up!

Anger and pain are two sides of the same coin… both leave only destruction in their wake…

You can’t escape the people, situations or memories which give rise to these emotions in you. All you can work upon is your own mind and inner peace…

Buck up!

Bidding Adieu…

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Never wanted to say goodbye,
Never wished to utter a sad sigh,
Never to find you gone from my side,
Never thought I would be alone on this ride.
 
Seems like it was just yesterday,
We were young and so in love,
Sunny and bright our days and nights,
Laughter filled the space between us.
 
Now the day has grown old, the light’s retreated,
I wonder when fights became our norm,
The lies and accusations grew tenfold,
The hurt in your eyes cut me to the bone!
 
All that was left was the final act,
Of this little play, now the curtain’s dropped.
We make a bow to the empty house,
The dreams shattered, littered piles!
 
And still the goodbye flays me alive,
Knife-edged pain shreds my heart,
I break like a million pieces of glass,
Bloodied, battered – an unrecognizable mass.

Life in Binary…

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A keen sense of loss,
Intense is the desolation,
Dreary seems the world,
I’m going through the motions.

The motions that are necessary,
If you want to call yourself alive,
Though I do wonder what use is life,
When it’s just meant for pain and strife.

Or is one meant to,
Conquer all and emerge a hero?
What use is such analysis,
If the only denominator is zero?

The zero that begets infinity,
An infinity of life and death,
And whatever goes in between,
A recurring chain of binary!

All human lives and actions,
Replaced with zero and one,
That I see no exceptions,
Similar patterns, unique none!

Now I see the code of life,
Everything is suddenly clear,
There’s no pain or strife anymore
Only the path to action!