Isolation…

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Isolation in my mind
Dark shadows everywhere.
Cut apart, left adrift in the currents
Float do I in the flotsam of life.

Despair do I
Want to cry
Sometimes I cannot understand myself
A thousand emotions on a thousand shelves.

Overcrowded are they.
Pull out an emotion you may
Try but in the end of the day
A discordant symphony you play.

Discordant symphony or a cacophony
All they are, are fake, are phony
An empty mind, a desolation
Even the Doc says how bogus are my notions.

Lie heavily on my heart, does the isolation
Broken memories, false emotions
Weep, weep does my heart at the blackness
Surrounded as it is by shades of grey.

Is it all a farce played upon my mind
Or the truth of a fractured one?
I walk the thorny path of truth
Without a correct measure to enlighten.

I welcomed the numbness
In the beginning brought on by the meds
Alas, they are done for now
Isolation darkens the horizon now.

Addiction…

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There is no freedom at the bottom of the bottle… Any form of addiction, even in its mildest dose, brings only more shackles…more chains…more bonds…

There is no freedom anywhere unless you understand the impermanence and uncertainty permeating every sphere of your life – people, situations, emotions, everything!
You were born strong… So, why give up now? Why make it your crutch? Just persist for a little while more and you will have reached the core of strength inside you. Touch it, draw from it… Free yourself…

Words…

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So you need me to say
The words in which
I can tell you
How much I miss you?

Words – what do they mean?
Real, made up, faked
I might not always be true
When I say things to you.

So you need me to say
The words in which
I can tell you
How much I need you?

Can’t you just read my eyes?
Know from the beating of my heart
My every single breath is yours
In this life and beyond these shores.

Love is like a full moon night
Simple, silent, constant, bright.
No written vows nor spoken words
It’s a communion of two souls pure.

What I learnt today…

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Others cannot hurt you. The actions of others do not give rise to emotions in you. You feel, you react because those emotions are already there inside you. You react to your own emotions. You perceive the words and actions of others the way you have habituated yourself to do. Good habits and bad – both are learned, both trainable. Your perception is what that matters. If your perception is positive, your emotions are positive, then you keep calm even in the most dire and worst of situations. If your perception is negative, then you end up making yourself miserable even in the best situation.

Don’t blame others for your misery. The root of it lies within yourself, in your own mind, in the training you have given your mind. Improve your thoughts, improve your mind, educate it, don’t be blind. Improve your self, improve your life. The path to eternal happiness lies within your own mind. Find it. Walk on it diligently, sincerely. In no time, you will reach your goal. Become the calm, serene, deep lake that you can be. No ripples, no waves. Just peace. Just sanity. Just happiness. Don’t beg for happiness, don’t cry for it or feel as if you are entitled to it. No one is! Work for it, work hard! Train your mind, make it pure. That’s the only way.

So simple and yet so difficult….:)

Be happy!

Free Wings….

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I am free today.
Don’t depend on you.
Your pitiful morsels
Of time and attention.
You are free today
To live the way
You have always wanted.
The lodestone around your neck
Is gone today.
I cared and cried.
Begged you to
Spend a while
Thinking and caring for me.
But it was too much for you.
Your self-centered life.
You were the brightest star
Of your own universe.
Took me for granted
But not for long
Can’t take anymore
I give it up!
So now you go
Get on with your life
Won’t be a lackey
For one so flaky!
I am free today
From your dues!
The loan’s paid in full
Still I am rich.
You are poor
You lost something valuable
You didn’t give a dime.
But never fear
You’ll never know
As you are unaware.
Self-absorbed as you are.

Trapped…

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I am trapped
Show me the way
Please oh please
Something show me the way.

I am caught
In a web of lies and deceit
My lungs burn for air
Suffocating against the weave.

I fight
The urge to thrash
Against the ropes
The walls that I am lashed.

I shred
The skin off my bones
In blind panic
Hurl against the stones.

I thirst
My throat’s on fire
An agony in my stomach
I dream a pyre.

I howl
My soul rattles and clangs
A fight for freedom
A dirge it sang.

I fly
High above the clouds
Wispy, ethereal
No darkness shrouds.