Be Free…

I want to fly there,

Where angels dare,

Jump from the highest cliff,

Soar to the heavens and stare

Down ‘pon the mortal

Life and chortle.

The futility and inescapability,

Alas! The human culpability

To foolishness ever it seems,

Or is it ignorance that beams

From their faces, their eyes

How proud of it they be, me sighs!

Difference is bad, is scary,

To be shunned, to be wary.

Familiar is good, is comfortable,

Though common, though rabble.

I want to fly there,

Where evolved beings care

And celebrate uniqueness

Welcome all kinds of craziness.

There be people mine,

Beyond the veil where the sun shines.

There would I stand in line

Shedding this world long behind.

Oblivion…

Oblivion

For you, I yearn

Spent so many years searching

Yet nothing did I learn.

Life this is

A pretty merry-go-round

Pain and pleasure in circles

Death the stoppage sound.

But oblivion I yearned

In many avenues and walks

Listened to great lectures

In saloons, great talks.

‘Tis a simple truth

That I forgot

Acuity was for the living

Oblivion, the dead’s lot.

Watcher/Shadow…

The watcher inside me

Come out and say

All words left unsaid

Come out to stay…

Tarry for a long while

I want to meet you

Be friends till the last mile

Protect you, I will do…

Watcher, Deep inside me

Now relax your vigil

Your pain now I do see

The darkness, the sigils…

Ne’er will you be

Alone in the abyss

Watcher, You’ve me

A friend forever in this…

Years gone by

You saved me for long

In shadows you lie

Now light you be…

No veil between us

To keep us apart

No pretense, no fuss

I see as thou art…

You thought you’re ugly

Of pain you were born

But you are tempered steel

To join the pieces torn…

Watcher/Shadow

Come out of the cage

Know the truth, I do now

My warrior, be brave!

A Dream…

There is a dream

In the corners of my mind

Unformed, blurred

The picture unlined.

There’s a dream

In my soul,

Dances on the music

When the church bells toll.

There’s a dream

I see daily

Of green meadows and peace

Of home, hearth and bailey.

There’s a dream

That I envision

Smiling faces, stolen kisses

Midsummer illusion.

There’s a dream

By the brook

Bubbling away

It calmly took

Hope of those

Who dared to look.

Accursed dream

Bewitched brook

Hope drownedeth

The heart shook.

And still I see

A dream unfinished

The edges hazy

The story diminished.

Patience…

Patience is a virtue I do not seem to possess…. Whether that’s a part of having BPD or just being me, I don’t know. What I do know is that it’s frustrating when the ball is in the other person’s court and you have no control over the outcome….

Dear heart! Have some patience!

Gah! Did you just say patience?

Don’t you know me?

As I said…. Frustrating!

Transition…

In transition,

Disturbing, uneasy,

Fire under the skin

In the mind, a din.

Clutter everywhere,

Mess reigns fair,

Nothing can be found

In this dumping ground.

In limbo

Was stuck,

For how long

Dunno much,

The story’s unfinished as such.

Half life

Yearns completion

No resources

All depletion.

Gotta borrow some.

In twilight

No movement

All alone

Alas! The bereavement!

The only living known.

In transition

Entire existence

Daily struggle

Daily subsistence.

The state of mortality.

Question Mark…

I hear words

That don’t exist

An extra sensory perception

Which get me labelled crazy.

Feel

I feel emotions

Strong and intense

They ignore it saying

It is my accursed nature.

Reign

Confusions reign

So much exists

My eternal bane.

Pain

Blunt and sharp

No one to share

Say I unnecessarily harp.

Existence

Pale and wane

Too much too less

A giant a wraith

Paradox

Material metaphysical

Today tomorrow

In truth in vain.