Dear Friend

Today I received a very pleasant surprise from my past. It was a letter from my ex-roommate. I hate writing sappy things but it was a letter full of love, happiness and support (that’s the way I am taking it, Friend). This one’s for her and all my other friends:

Dear Friend(each of you just read your own names here…:-D),

Whenever I revisited the space-time where we shared the same space, where we were roommates, I always had this question as to the nature of our relationship: Were we friends, enemies, colleagues or co-sufferers in that small town? Today, I have my answer. Slowly did the memories fade away, faces relegated to the past. Your letter was a complete shocker to me and hence, even more special. The way you said it – it’s been ten years. A long ten years during which both of us have been through different kinds of experiences, maybe grown a little smarter, a little more matured than we used to be(that’s the hope , anyways…:-)). I would love to take this moment and space here to thank all the people who have been there for me in my toughest hours and those too who could not be in touch but allocated some really valuable real estate for me in their thoughts.

Yes, my Friend, thank you… You see how much I have changed. Thanking “people” on an open platform where anyone and everyone can read it.

To all my well-wishers:

I am finally at a place where I can very happily say that the depression and BPD are the best things that ever happened to me. This is no empty platitude. To quote Nietzsche – That which doesn’t kill us, makes us stronger. Okay, I’ll say – depression’s one mean bitch! But BPD has been very good to me. It has made it possiblefor me to experience each moment of my life as if it were a movie. The dreamer in me couldn’t ask for more. I have always been a little out of sync with the world around me and I still love to escape the drudgery sometimes. BPD made it possible – it taught me how to tune out the world and  focus solely on my thoughts. I have so many emotions that I can hardly recognize or understand even a quarter of them. Works like a charm every time to make my mind stronger and flexible.

I have always been stubborn and a self believer. Failing at curing depression and BPD was never an option. Whenever you find yourself on the lowest rung of this ladder called life, all you can do is start climbing up – or you could stay in situ too but that gets very boring very fast. So, you climb up.

I have always wanted to die the best version of the person I was born, the person I could be. My struggle has proved invaluable in that respect. Change is the one constant in life – the one thing that remains unaltered is change. I, too, have been changing, transforming even transcending(just love the word!) every moment.

Keep Walking…

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The Path…

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The dark path or the path towards light… It’s a choice… The path towards light is good, is right…. But the dark path – oh so tempting!

I resist the temptation…. Moment by moment…. A moment resisted is a moment conquered….

Keep resisting… Keep walking…

Keep Walking!

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This journey of life is about finding your “self” or the absence of it. Keeping walking!

Good and bad is a myth. There is only experience. Embrace it. Learn from it. Persevere. Evolve. Keep walking!

A Guide to Harrowing Emotions: Part – II

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1. One is one’s own strength… That’s what this life is all about – finding one’s strength within oneself…
And when one finds it, it is one’s responsibility to nurture it and care for it the way one’s does for one’s own baby…until one day it grows so strong and mature that it is capable of making it’s own decisions, overcoming any tragedy, any mishap, any hurdle and ultimately, help in realizing the future one dreamt of…

2. In every struggle between the brain and the heart, let the brain win every time and you won’t have to regret any decision ever.

Being Stupid…

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How can love be good when it hurts so bad? How can relationships be good when they take away your independence? How can emotions be a virtue and a lack of them inhuman when they cloud your reason, dirty your mind and make everything unsure and uncertain! Free will and free mind are the unique characteristics of being human… An emotional state steals away your humanity! A perfectly logical mind is the utopia of the rational man… You say there’s a hell! I say – Hell yes! An overly emotional person is in the hell of her own making!